Friday, August 20, 2010

How to deal with a recently divorced man?

Seeing a recently divorced man for about two months. First of all things were great, then he would go to his moods swings of being distant then norman again. I know the holidays are hard for him to deal with..( wife left him about 7 months ago) but why sulk..he has no kids and she left him. I think he mentioned that he wants to know why she left. where I guess she just wanted it and he think she was seeing someone else .But why do divorced men or woman need to know what the problem was before they can move on. Does it make them feel validated?..If they knew exactly why will they move on faster or make them more bitter..? I never been married or divorced.How to deal with a recently divorced man?
did you REALLY just say this ';But why do divorced men or woman need to know what the problem was before they can move on.'; ???????????





oh, I don't know perhaps so that they DON'T REPEAT THE SAME MISTAKE OR CHOICE AGAIN.





He needs space. Don't be selfish --- give him space to do what he needs to do. you are being a little bit unreasonable and insensitive. If you really love him --- you would have an attitude of patience. You might be al ittle too needy for what he can give you right now......





Why not ask him what he needs? Tell him what you need. If he can't give you what you need --- either move on -- or take *RESPONSIBILITY* for the fact that you are choosing to stay with someone who already told you that he can't give you what you need.How to deal with a recently divorced man?
You asked: But why do divorced men or woman need to know what the problem was before they can move on?





Answer: So they can have closure and move on. Also, it will help out knowing what the problems were so they can fix them and have a healthier relationship the next time around.





If it's only been 7 months I would tread very carefully. It's obvious he's not ready yet.
it took me over two years before i got over the divorce. oh and i didn't date during that time....i began dating after 2.5 years.
Rejection is hard to take. Especially the first time.
Ask yourself this do i like being rejected





I have saw men who really didn't love there wives fight too keep it together because they didn't want to be rejected for another man. Rejection hurts like heck.
First off, what makes you blame the fact that he is divorced on his mood? No offense, but maybe he is just not that into you and is trying to figure out what he wants.





Or maybe he is trying to figure out what he did wrong and doesn't want to screw up another relationship until he figures it out. Divorced or just broken up without a marriage involved, many people like to learn from their past mistakes. Its a huge part of dating.
You've never been married or divorced before that's why you don't know the feeling. Maybe he wants to know because he loved her before he met you. He must have loved his wife a lot and really want to know why is wife left him. Help him and be there for him. Show him that you care. Good luck
Its the death of a relationship and the poor guy isn't even sure why it died. He needs closure and then he needs to mourn. It's unrealistic for him to get out of the divorce and date so soon. It's only going to compound his problems.
It's human nature to want to know what went wrong even if you don't want the person back.

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